What role does birth order play?


Whether you are the first born, the middle child, or the baby of the family your birth order can say a lot about your character, personality, and who you are. When reading up on the studies I was amazed on how right many of the said characteristics were when I compared them to myself, my family and my friends.

I am the first of three girls in my family, all 2 years apart. Through out my life my role has always been leader, starting at an early age I led my sisters. Whether I was recognizing that role by leading them through numerous Sister’s Club meetings, hating the role as they tried to copy my style and choices, or being oblivious to the fact that I was leading them always as they looked up to me and used me as an example, I was always leading. Because of my early days of leading, I took those skills straight into the rest of my life. I always get excited to lead and take action when I want to make our school, or better yet, the world, a better place. Other first born traits that I possess are the fact that I am a people pleaser that craves approval, I am reliable and a team player. However, I am more aggressive than compliant. I am a mover and shaker, a natural leader, a perfectionist, and I am a very driven person that wants things her way.

My sister Margie is the middle child, squashed between Olivia and I. Margie seems to fall under the second middle born category. She is outgoing, friendly, loud, laid back and patient. She tries to stand out next to Olivia and me, she wants everyone to know that she is her own person and has her own personality. She shows this in her sense of style and the things she likes to do. She is also definitely a peacemaker. However, Margie is more than the ordinary middle child, she is a perfectionist, always trying to do her best, she is very nurturing and is always there for you when you are hurt, she also adores babies and children. Next comes our wild child, the baby of the family and the one that brightens every day with her smile and brilliant sense of humor. She is a risk taker, especially when it comes to skiing, and she is always seeking attention. She has gone through a few phases that have brought her a lot of attention. The first phase was her “Other Life Stage” where she was married to her crush, and had 3 kids. Next came her Boy Phase, not the obsessed with boys phase but the “Alter Ego Stage” where she took on the persona of Jake and was a boy for almost a year. Olivia is also sensitive and hard working but most of all she is entertaining.

My parents come from very different family lives that have shaped them to be different people; however they still get along great. My mom is the 11th child of 12 and she seems to possess traits of more than one title. This is probably due to the dynamics of such a large family. My mom seems to match the qualities of an oldest child, as she is a huge leader, very driven, and an absolute perfectionist among other first born traits. She also matches perfectly to the second middle born option being outgoing, friendly, loud, laidback and sometimes patient. She is also flexible, diplomatic, competitive, and very much a peacemaker.

My Dad comes from a much different background, he was the 3rd of three children, the baby in the family, and he was also raised much like an only child, though he still takes on the persona and traits of the last born. My dad was born 12 years after his brother and 15 years after his sister. When he was four his parents split and when he was 14 his mom died, adding to the unfortunate turn of events. Today, when I look at my dad’s character and p[personality I know that he definitely matches the youngest child. He is a risk taker, he has an excellent sense of humor, he is hard working, and he remains immature. He is attention seeking and sensitive as well.

When I look around at my close friends I realize that they are all in different groups, other girls in the groups are my friends too, we just aren’t as close. My best friend, Jessica, is a middle born child; however, when we are together she assumes the role of the leader. Perhaps this is because I am one of the few people in her life she can lead, or maybe it is the sole reason that she is older. Whatever it is, when I am with her, it is the one part of my life where I am often a follower. When I look at my group of friends; Sacha, Keely, Ian, and Jake, I notice that we are a combination of oldest and only children. I think that when you have a diversity of birth order in your group of friends it helps to balance everybody out.


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